Wednesday, April 11, 2007
I Am The Baby Whisperer
Tonight I went to dinner at the house of dear friends who had invited other dear friends who recently had twin girls. It was the first time I had seen the darling babies, and they were gorgeous, bright-eyed, delightfully alert and engaging babies. I fell in love. Just one problem: they were relentlessly fussy.
Now I am used to fussy babies -- my daughter, now 16, was the fussiest baby ever. I simply got used to putting her in various holds and going about my business. I could do a load of laundry and wash a sink of dishes while gently bouncing my fussy, whiny baby in the football hold.
Tonight, I soothed two fussy babies effortlessly, despite being aggressively hit on by a single father whose wife recently left him. Despite all the proclamations of: "You are HOT! You are totally HOT! You are going to be single for about nine minutes!" -- I managed to politely brush him off, and focus on totally quieting the babies while drawing pictures for his three-year-old daughter. In short, I impressed myself. Not only did I soothe and calm two colicky, fussy babies, earning accolades as "the baby whisperer,'' I managed to fend off the advances of a handsome and horny, yet certainly desperate, man. I am not going to jump into another relationship. I am going to mourn the one I lost, because it meant the world to me. And why? Because I am an adult. And I have learned. And it feels quite good to be an adult , despite the pain. I soothe fussy babies, not fussy adult, fragile egos. And that is how it should be.